I've always known this thing about myself. Since I was able to understand it. My mom always tells me it. I'm totally aware and conscious of it. I've come to learn that it is one of my favorite things about who God has created me to be but at the same time one of the most draining and hard things about who God has created me to be.
You see, I love people. Sometimes too much, if that's possible. I love investing in relationships and learning about people and walking with them through life. And almost every time I begin to empathize with them through life. Which is something I love. I think my emotions and things are so much more real to me because I take on the burdens of those around me. But not just their burdens, but their joys as well. You see, I've come to the point when I can tell when my own emotions will be compromised to fit those of people around me (totally unhealthy I know). The people closest around me. My best friends. The people who I find home in.
*Just a side note since I think I say that a lot. By finding home I mean when my heart is at peace. Everything around me fades and nothing really matters a whole lot except the moment I'm in. The feeling when I'm surrounded by those friends who I know accept me for who I am and who fill me up when I'm empty. The ones who comfort my heart when its a little broken and the ones who rejoice with me in daily things.
Its interesting in this season of trying to figure out what to do with life after graduation. A few have some idea but most have none. Recently a home-kind-of-friend found out that the plan they had was no longer the plan. I know that's vague but it was one of those moments where I could feel myself abandoning my own emotions and taking on the weight of his. So interesting is this part of me. I love it and hate it. Sometimes it's a burden but most of the time I'm glad its there.
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